update: Swap, Kindle, life stuff

[red_lasbelin]

Yay for another My Slashy Valentine swap finished! I have run the MSV swap since 2011 - it feels so strange that it's been three years now. I got a fabulous fic in return: Zeen's Lighter than Vanity. It's Celebrimbor/Annatar, and its highlights are Annatar, who is evil, selfish, intelligent, vain with a farseeing agenda, Celebrimbor's friendship with the dwarves and a little tiny mention of Celebrimbor/Galadriel, who I ship like burning apparently. Pleasantly not too dark!

I also wrote this year. It was such a struggle to put words on the page for this one - a E/G reincarnation AU - but I'm glad I kept with it. If you'd like to read it, my story is here: Ghosts That We Knew. The one downside to running the MSV swap and also being a participant is I feel very weird about moaning on LJ now about how hard my fic is to write and running up against deadline, so now I just moan very quietly to a few people and still (even after swearing this is the year I will finish the fic on time) run late. I like to think I'll change this, but it's been my method of operation for almost ten years.

I'm trying to read through the swap and comment on the stories I like. I've got a fanfic-to-read list that is a mile high, particularly after the fandom snowflake challenge. I also have a big pile of books I'd like to read too. I made a reading goal of 50 books this year, which when I was younger would have been done in 3 months, but now I don't think I managed that number the past couple of years. Waaay too many tv shows.

I did buy a Kindle Paperwhite, with money from a Christmas gift and a bit from my savings. I had a Kindle previously - accidentally left it on the plane on the way back from Paris last year. I didn't realize how very much I missed having a Kindle until I had the Paperwhite in my hands again. I absolutely adore it - just so readable and so many books at your fingertips. For my usage, the back light aspect is absolutely golden! With the Kindle, I'm even hopefully optimistic that I might beat my challenge of 50 books and more.

Backlogged at work - less said about that the better, and I'm trying to figure out potentially new living arrangements. I'm also trying to be proactive about my mood and general health, which is slow-going. It helps that it's been warmer and it's starting to get lighter in the mornings. Must remember it's about the journey, not necessarily the destination. I'm currently trying to find a new faith home as well, one whose beliefs match up more with mine, but it's slow going and sometimes rolling out of bed on Sunday takes a lot of willpower.

Trying to decide if it is worth it to drive to Tennesse and back see a poet from Portland. I love her work, she's one of the people who made me get into poetry over the last year and a half or so. It's an eight hour round trip, plus I wouldn't be overnighting, so loooong day. It would be an adventure? I missed her Chicago event, which would be about the same distance. I might decide to catch her on another tour though. I'd like to get more into the local poetry scene, but I don't really know where to start. Tumblr's been great for getting connected with people whose work speaks to me, but they're often not local.

So that's it for right now. Quiet and waiting for spring.

Comments

[ilye-elf.livejournal.com]

I had no idea you were running MSV. I always have a great admiration for the people who devote their time to these events and it's lovely to see when they're so successful.

Last time I read something you linked to on your LJ, I lost about 7 hours of a Wednesday night's sleep to Off The Record (and a day at work as collateral damage). Fortunately today is Friday and your own fic isn't 100k long - but still a brilliant read. Poignant, compelling and beautifully written. I honestly couldn't tell it was a struggle at all.

"Trying to decide if it is worth it to drive to Tennesse and back see a poet from Portland [...] It's an eight hour round trip."

My fiancee currently lives an eight-hour round trip away. The journey is awful, but I think deep down you know whether it's worth making or not, especially if the travelling is the only thing standing in the way. Sometimes it actually is about the destination ;-)

(frozen)

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

The swap's changed hands over the years - I think it started with Orchyd, then Fimbrethil and Minuial and Kenaz worked on it. Then it was down to Kenaz for a good while and she needed help so I volunteered. I picked up the MSV swap and she kept working on the summer swap, with the exception of last summer. Her work schedules gave her no time to run it, so she asked me. It's really wonderful to give back to the community I've loved so much and gotten a lot from.

I'd say I'm sorry about Off the Record, but I'm not. *G* I also lost a lot of my life to that fic. It's engrossing. Mine is much, much shorter, yes. I don't think I've ever written anything over 12k. Thank you for the comment though - I'm glad the struggle doesn't show through, I was banging my head into the wall and dramatically saying I'll never write again. Oi.

Oh, I didn't know you were engaged! That's awesome. I'm still on the fence, but you're right - it might be worth it just for the trip and the experience.

[ilye-elf.livejournal.com]

I wasn't really expecting you to be sorry. I'm not really sorry either. Just sayin' ;-)

I'm an advocate of writing because it's meant to be fun, but there are always exceptions. Sometimes it takes a while, but you can eventually look back at a really tough story and be proud of it because it came out well despite (or maybe because of) the struggle. I hope this is one of those for you.

And yes, as of about a month ago *g* Moral of the story? Be nice to your beta-reader. Or, possibly, make the eight-hour round trip. It's a bit late at night for me to be profound so I should really leave finding the moral to you!

Also, quick fingers got the better of me but meant to add in the last comment: best of luck with the search for a new faith home. I can't imagine how much willpower it must have taken in the first place to realise the current situation is not right for you and start searching for something else, so I really hope you find something that is all you want.

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

Congratulations! That's a special beta relationship :D (Does it ever make prodding her to get beta work back to you a little diplomatically tricky though?)

And thanks for the wishes. I'm kind of in between worlds at the moment there and very confused. And there's a lot of baggage as well (like being told religion/theology is not a buffet and you don't get to pick what works for you the best and what doesn't.) but I'm cautiously hopeful.

[ilye-elf.livejournal.com]

Thank you :-) It can require diplomacy sometimes but I can also make it worth her while *grin* Plus she frequently talks me into writing bits and pieces so the favour works both ways. And then there are the conversations about writing and characters in the car, over dinner...

like being told religion/theology is not a buffet and you don't get to pick what works for you the best and what doesn't

Oh, seriously? Surely that is exactly what it's about? Personally I don't have a faith and never have done, so perhaps I have a warped view on it, but you can't force somebody to believe in anything if their heart or brain is leading them elsewhere. I hope the cautious hope grows into something more for you soon. X
 

[engarian.livejournal.com]

I'm always so impressed with anyone who runs a major fandom event and you do a splendid job. I was sorry to not participate this time but had way too many things already on my plate. I've always enjoyed the challenge of writing for another person's vision. *hugs* and a big Thank You for all you do for MSV.

- Erulisse (one L)

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

Aww, thank you, Erulisse! I hope you join us next time, but I definitely understand having a lot on one's plate.

[larienelengasse.livejournal.com]

I would like to join in here and say how much I appreciate you running that swap. It's a lot of work and hopefully not a thankless job. I'd also like to reiterate how much I loved the fic you wrote for this MSV swap. It was so unique and beautiful.

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much, Larien. It's definitely not a thankless job most days, and you and the other lovely participants help make it go as smoothly as it does.

(And I'm really glad you liked the fic! I'm kind of amazed I wrote it, lol.)

[aglarien1.livejournal.com]

I can't imagine who would ever not want to carry their library around with them. My kindle goes everywhere with me.

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

Yes! And I love paperback and hard cover books, but not having to store or transport them is a plus and the ability to have so many at our finger tips is just a marvelous invention.

[minuial_nuwing]

Your fic was incredible. I have read it two more times, and I still cannot come up with an adequate comment. It is just so, so heartbreaking.

Thank you for taking on the responsibility of MSV. The Slashy swaps are one a helluva job, but I would hate to see them die. So much tradition, so many spectacular stories.

**hugs**

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

Gosh, Min. Thank you for loving the fic. I blink at it and wonder where it came from sometimes. I wish there was a happier ending, but sometimes the stories that you feel the most don't have a clean ending.

You are endlessly welcome - I'm always thrilled every time you sign up for the swap. I think for a lot of people, the swaps have been around as long as they've been in fandom, and it's really special to help contribute to that tradition. And so many fabulous stories to read! Can't let them go down. :)

(And I hope your week will be better than this last one.) *hugs very tight*

[keiliss.livejournal.com]

Poetry - yes, go! Don't let it be a 'wish I had' kind of memory.

You do a great job with MSV (sometimes under really difficult circumstances). I think it's good for the swap to have two mods involved so there's backup if one of you has heavy RL pressures. Means things stay consistent, which is great for the fandom.

About your fic -- the ones that crawl out slowly and with a lot of pain are usually the ones that are meant to be written (no, well, sometimes they're the ones where you don't have a clue, and why did she give you this awful prompt in the first place??? but - mainly they're the good ones). I don't think Troy and Fin's story is over, but not sure there's a happy ending. Not in this life. Maybe the next. I don't often cry while I beta something, but I did at the end of Ghosts That We Knew.

Kindle. Yes.

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

I came, I saw - I got a picture! Was so much fun. I think I was on some sort of high on the first two hours driving back.

Thank you - it means a lot to me to try to run a good swap where people feel welcome and excited to participate. Life does tend to get crazy around swap time though. I need to invest in bubblebath or some sort of good de-stresser. I do hope K will be able to continue with the summer swap, it's a good balance. And consistency is key, though I swear everyone forgets until sign-up weeks come along :D

I have never felt so sure that I couldn't write, lol. Thank you for the encouragement along the way, I would have given up on my own. Maybe the next life for them will be happier, a world where they can be together. Another cycle, another lesson. (still have this deep down feeling Fin and drugs without Troy don't mix well in the long run, though.)

You were right - I should have ordered the kindle two weeks before I did.

[erviniae.livejournal.com]

Thanks for doing the swap again. Even though I didn't participate, I've enjoyed reading many of the stories.

[red-lasbelin.livejournal.com]

It's my pleasure, truly. And thank you for the fic recs (mine included!) - I love seeing the fic rec lists. :)